The Sins Of Spitzer, The Spin Of The Pundits, The Death Of Shame, And The Fall Of Man by Doug Wrenn

The Sins Of Spitzer, The Spin Of The Pundits, The Death Of Shame, And The Fall Of Man

By Doug Wrenn

March 14, 2008

Disgraced New York Governor Eliot Spitzer's resignation speech almost sounded like a speech once given by a similarly egotistical General Douglas MacArthur. The only component missing from this insipid, sanctimonious polemic of pontification was the promise, "I shall return," although a seemingly narcissistic and still remorseless Spitzer certainly seems to have left that door open, at least in his mind, where he is still a great legend and not a pathetic fallen fool, blindly drowning in his own entrenched false pride. Obviously, he just doesn't get it. Many observers of this recent scandal seem to be a little confused, too.

Pundits Bill O'Reilly, Monica Crowley and Michael Savage, as well as former New York Mayor Ed Koch have all explained away Spitzer's trysts (AKA: "The Spitzer Trysters") with the excuse of some sort of mental illness. A friend of mine, who professionally works with the criminally insane, would take great exception to that theory from these armchair quarterbacks who are as bereft of the obligatory couch as they are a shingle to professionally practice their pseudo-head shrinking. As my friend often says, as he typically bristles at people so often excusing bad behavior from individuals as supposedly being "sick," far fewer people are actually "sick" then we care to believe. Many of them are just simply evil.

Then of course, are the Democrats, who so often see moral Republicans as hypocrites when they trip over themselves. It's not because Republicans are hypocrites, as all human are flawed, but because Democrats never see themselves as hypocrites, because let's face it; they pretty much have no moral values anyway. My unabashedly Democrat boss made a typical snide quip to me this morning that he was surprised that a Democrat got caught in an alleged sexual or sexually related peccadillo, as he claimed that it's usually a Republican in such a spot. I quickly shot back to my boss that he has a short and selective memory, apparently ending at the conclusion of the Clinton years. I guess the names of Massachusetts Congressman Barney Frank, New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevey, Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom, or former presidential wannabe Gary Hart, just to name a few notable names, don't ring any bells, either. By the way, since that less than cordial political debate, I'm now looking for a job if anybody's hiring. Democrats need not respond.

Speaking of Democrats, or for their northeast independent cronies (AKA: "Liberals Without A Party"), the sordid, soiled and contaminated Clinton years have been resurrected to our gastric displeasure, like a wayward phoenix, flying out of a cesspool instead of ashes. I am hearing more voices in the news and on talk radio stating that this is a "personal matter," which Spitzer himself also earlier said, and that he didn't do anything that wrong and prostitution should not be a crime anyway because it is nobody else's business and it is a "victimless crime." Sigh! Where to begin?

"It's a personal matter" is liberal cop-out talk akin to "While I am personally opposed to abortion, I do believe that a woman has the right to choose." (To complete that often-unfinished sentence, "…to kill her own baby in her womb." Gee, now wonder they always leave that part out!) This backwards gobbledygook should be followed up by the obligatory wink and nod, because let's face it, nobody is really fooled as to either the definition or the motive behind this pitifully poor drivel that supposedly passes for code to conceal popular but still grossly unbecoming conduct.

First of all, it's not just a personal matter. It's a crime, as it well should be. We have a geographically challenged President, forgetful of which country elected him, unconstitutionally dumping millions and billions of our tax dollars to supposedly stop AIDS in Africa, a noble endeavor more appropriately in the purview of private charities than of our structurally and intended limited federal government, yet we give prostitution on our own streets a pass with a an "Aw, shucks!" attitude and a hokey slap on the back, like it's no more egregious than spitting on the sidewalk. Hey folks, newsflash, you can't spread your AIDS and pay for it, too!

Prostitution not only demeans human dignity from both participants (something you'll never hear feminists say for some odd reason, unless their once again badmouthing men), but it also spawns sexually transmitted diseases to an unsuspecting spouse at home, or to one's other extra-marital lusters. (Sorry, but somehow the term "lovers" just doesn't quite seem appropriate here.) Prostitution also spawns other crimes, such as assault, sexual assault, robbery, drug transactions, kidnapping, and even murder in some cases. Untolled billions are being made globally by predators kidnapping young girls and shipping them to other countries, including the US, to work as prostitutes while literally living in bondage. Between 1861 and 1865, we zealously slaughtered 600,000 of our own people in a civil war to ensure that no man or woman is ever enslaved again. Now it's OK with a wink and a nod, and a "Boys will be boys" pass. Don't tell me it's a victimless crime. And no, boys don't have to be boys. (Oops…I better explain that one!) Among other factors, two differences starkly separate people from animals. First, animals only fornicate to procreate, not to recreate. (Two, four, six, eight, who do we appreciate…oops. Sorry. Too many crazy "ates" there!) Secondly, unlike animals, humans have both the intellect and yes, the ability to decide not to have sex, so guys, enough already with this shallow, macho, unstoppable primal hormone nonsense.

Even if you don't believe prostitution should be illegal, the fact is that right now it is illegal. Until that law is repealed, then it is still a crime, be it for some horny loser with more free time than common sense on a Friday night, or the Chief Executive Officer and Chief Law Enforcement official for the state of New York on an unofficial business trip, on or near Valentine's Day, no less. And in the case of the Governor of New York, making himself vulnerable to such senseless criminal activity also makes him a prime target to be blackmailed, thus potentially compromising the integrity and effectiveness of the state government of New York. (It's OK. I'll stop writing for a minute while you stop laughing and try to catch your breath.) Spitzer, on top of everything else, a former Attorney General who prosecuted people for such crimes, should also have known better, particular considering that he took a mole hill of a common misdemeanor, engaging in prostitution, and bumped it up to a mountain by allegedly paying to transport his little rent-a-honey over state lines to do it, with then becomes a federal crime. In addition to that, he also allegedly wired his payment money over state lines, another crime, and possibly laundered that money, ping-ponging it from one account to another, and at least one or more of those accounts questionable in nature, which also set off some red flags. It's also been reported in the news today that this same escort service that Spitzer was allegedly involved with also allegedly had mob connections. Disagree all you wish about whether prostitution should be a crime or not, but there may have been more than one crime conducted here, and playing slap & tickle for money with the interstate rent-a-honey only seems to be the tip of the iceberg here. Last but not least, as a constitutional official, Spitzer took an oath to uphold the law, all laws, despite anyone's opinions of them, as well as his state's constitution. It would appear that Spitzer's alleged "victimless personal matter" was the basis of his violation of at least one part of that solemn oath. (Yes, "Ripley," much like marriage vows, oaths are actually solemn, believe it, or not!) One also should wonder how New York state tax dollars were being utilized. While the 80 large Spitzer supposedly splurged on his human sex toys over several years seems to be his own money, were his State Police body guards with him and on the clock during these sexual expeditions? Were state vehicles or other state resources used to help facilitate this "boy's" not so-innocent and not so-innocuous urges and splurges? If such were the case, then this "victimless personal matter" also crossed the not so-fine line into the realm of embezzlement, and yes, like it or not, that's a crime, too.

I'm waiting for the one common excuse that I have not heard yet, and that I have heard countless times before in the wake of fallen mayors, governors and even at least one president: "Yeah but he did a good job while in office." In other words: "Satisfy my wants and needs, and I'll gladly pay your salary with my hard-earned wages, no matter how guilty you really are of committing a crime." OK, now where was I? Ah, yes, now I remember. I was extrapolating about "prostitution." Thanks for the reminder, "John."

Spitzer's resignation seemed like the farce he dubbed an apology, a Shakespearean drama, featuring the awe-inspiring star as he triumphantly basked in the spotlight, apparently devoid of recognition or concern that few, if any were at all as impressed by the performance as Mr. Himself. Right up to the epilogue of this tragedy, Spitzer was the centerpiece, droning on about alleged magnanimous beliefs and values, and the gallantry of picking one's self up, practically dismissing the fall, and while seeming to either feign care for, if not forget about the gut punch he just gave to the people of his state, and above all, to his supposedly beloved family.

Guys like Spitzer don't appear with a wave of a magic wand. They evolve over time. And we are the dirty hands that mold these hideous shapes. When we lower the bar to near ground level, it seems fruitless to ponder why people walk over it instead of striving to reach up to it. Even weeds need fertile ground to flourish. I'm no shrink. I don't know if Spitzer's nuts. Maybe he has a legitimate sexual addiction, or maybe he's just a hedonistic cretin. Unlike other pundits and former mayors, I don't have a degree, be it real or imagined, in psychology or psychiatry. What I do know is what I observe. This man apparently feels little to no true remorse other than the fact that he got caught. And he does seem to know what he is doing. I would venture to say that he is more of a sociopath than a psychopath. All I see is a callous, self-absorbed mutant who came from privilege, and maybe got too much, too quickly in his life, and conceivably often desperately struggled to out-do the previous adrenaline rush. That aspect of Spitzer's life is not at all elite. In fact, he sadly has plenty of company in that regard. The rest of his lame act is just following the same old formula written by others on this same worn out path before him.

When the presumable book and the movie eventually come out, froth-mouthed lemmings with wide-eyed gazes everywhere will obediently line up like ducks in a shooting gallery to see them. That's our fallen nature. We're gawkers, rubberneckers, and maybe even ghouls. We watch hockey games for bloody fights, drag racing for horrific crashes, and reality shows to watch people willfully and publicly denigrate themselves, and often for the same Faustian ilk of shiny silver coins that caused Spitzer's imported little lust maiden to perform on command like a trained circus animal, and that caused Judas Iscariot betray Jesus Christ. As for us, the spectators, we justify our despicable and unquenchable thirst for gore and depravity with such lofty terms as "sport" and "entertainment," or maybe just innocent "curiosity." Indeed. Rumor has it that Joan of Arc drew quite a sell-out crowd at the stake, too. Nothing has changed since then.

And so we subtly but increasingly become desensitized over time. Cheating on your spouse is OK, as long as you don't get caught. It's a "personal" matter probably more often than not for "persons" with "matters" of their own that might well still be ever so precariously still covert. Yes, that's right. Add sweat and a gulp to that wink and nod. Part of our desensitization also requires denial. Hence, evil is so often replaced by sickness, or so we wish to believe. And for the narrow-minded, tunnel-visioned cheerleaders of partisan pabulum, let the gloating begin, as long as the captured lowlife in the perp walk on the 6:00 news, or the hapless soul getting mauled and disemboweled in the lion's den is from the other party.

This insidious bilge of moral relativism that is becoming ever increasingly prevalent in our society is consuming us as gradually but as surely as that loopy frog with that dopey smile on his face, as he contently and idly sits in the pan of cool water, itself sitting atop the stove burner that has just been turned up. Has anyone else noticed that as this "I'm OK, you're OK" mindset so rapidly spreads like a vile contagion, that so much more is becoming perceived as "OK" to the point that practically nothing is really "OK" anymore?

We've lost our way because we've lost our now obsolete sense of shame. In case you missed it, shame was last seen trying to catch up to personal accountability as it sprinted out the door. That little escapade occurred shortly after the debut of "If it feels good, do it," which was formally introduced to us by none other but our old adversary, "Challenge authority."

So during these choreographed mea culpa shows, pompous, arrogant, amoral schmucks like Spitzer continue to shirk, jerk, and maybe even smirk, like we're not supposed to know any better, even as we, the useful idiot spectators of the arena and the promoters of these corrosive circus acts gone awry, give a brazen thumbs up with a wink and a nod as we deny, excuse and sometimes even chuckle. But nothing about this is funny. Archbishop Fulton Sheen once said that wrong is still wrong, whether everybody believes it, only some people believe it, or nobody believes it. And Hitler's propaganda minister, Joseph Goebbels, hit the nail right on the head when he said that a lie told often enough soon becomes truth.

I don't live in New York. You might think that I have no dog in this fight. But this same stench claims no sole source and permeates all borders (kind of like our country's inept immigration policy). Eliot Spitzer is only one tiny particle of that vast, choking haze. This story is like a Jack Webb crime drama. We've seen it millions of times already in reruns, and every time, the story is true. Only the names and faces change.

For those of you who may still actually have an appetite right about now, I think those frog legs are just about done. Bon appetite! After all, it is said that the condemned may eat a hearty meal.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing."

(Edmund Burke)

Doug Wrenn